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The Obstacle is the Way - Ryan Holiday

One-Sentence Summary:

  • Stories from leaders to remind you to stop complaining and act. 

Rating On Time Of Review: 

  • Right place right time to remind me to STFU and focus on controlling myself. A+ for whipping you into the mindset to ignore the crowd around you because who cares about them.

Book notes below. My thoughts are in italics. Opinions are mine during the time of review.

Date Reviewed: 2020-04-27

Introduction:
“Bad companies are destroyed by crisis. Good companies survive them. Great companies are improved by them.” - Andy Grove, former CEO of Intel / Practically speaking about “antifragile” companies. Companies that thrive on panic… not just withstanding shocks but absorbing it to grow bigger and stronger. Thinking acquisitive companies with clean balance sheets in oversupplied industries will probably fare well in this COVID-19 era. Restaurants… maybe even RE/PE investing firms like BAM. 

“Not “be positive” but learn to be ceaselessly creative and opportunistic” / As Munger would say… “Invert!”. Optimism to find/create opportunity of the current moment is crucial. Not mere acceptance. 

The Discipline of Perception:
John D Rockefeller was a bookkeeper and aspiring investor before becoming an oil tycoon. Another model to keep in mind. Even when he received funding for drilling opportunities… he refunded the money after seeing the market was overexcited because that meant the time wasn’t right. Quite the self-discipline for a 25 year old. To not be swayed by the madness of crowds. 

Rockefeller took advantage of the crashes in 1873, 1907, 1929 to eventually control 90% of the oil industry. 

“… Rockefeller got this lesson in discipline somewhere, It began in that crisis of 1857 in what he called “the school of adversity and stress.””

“Oh, how blessed young men are who have to struggle for a foundation and beginning in life,” he once said. “I shall never cease to be grateful for the three and half years of apprenticeship and the difficulties to be overcome, all along the way.”

“Seen properly, everything that happens - be it an economic crash or a personal tragedy - is a chance to move forward.”

Recognize Your Power
Control over the self is all we have. This requires a change in perspective to obstacles. To not fault a system for if you do, that’s letting yourself be controlled by it. See it all as part of an adventure in life. 

“There is no good or bad without us, there is only perception. There is the event itself and the story we tell ourselves about what it means.”

Steady Your Nerves
“…. nerve is also a matter of acceptance: Well, I guess it’s on me then. I don’t have the luxury of being shaken up about this or replaying close calls in my head. I’m too busy and too many people are counting on me.” / Ah fuck. I feel called out… especially in light of recent times of daydreaming where I replay close calls of investing opportunities missed. Such waste and a luxury I cannot afford. 

Control Your Emotions
“Would you have a great empire? Rule over yourself” - Publius Syrus

Panic is easy. It sheds one of responsibilities and it’s so easy to blame existential situations for the reason to panic. But you cannot afford to panic. Panic doesn’t fix anything. As Taleb says, domesticate your emotions. Feel them but don’t be consumed by them. Most things in life are not catastrophic. Your world doesn’t end. Everything that happens is in the realm of probability so it’s quite reasonable to accept it as such. 

Good questions to consider in moments of panic and anxiety… Would you trade with Viktor Frankl’s Auschwitz? Are you going to die from this? Do you really need to be freaking out about this?

Practice Objectivity
“Epictetus told his students, when they’d quote some great thinker, to picture themselves observing the person having sex. It’s funny, you should try it the next time someone intimidates you or makes you feel insecure. See them in your mind, grunting, groaning, and awkward in their private life - just like the rest of us.” / The reality is that even my heroes are normal people… just normal people who happened to have ideas I didn’t think about or are doing things I didn’t know were possible. That is it. Most images of people are how I’ve concocted it to be in my head… but when I look at it as objectively as I can…. It can be helpful to take any emotion out of it. 

Pretty cool exercise in solving situations where I’m in a rut…. Is to think about this situation happening to someone else.. could be your partner or friend.. and think about how you would objectively ask them questions and what you would suggest to them. If this wasn’t happening to you… how would the advice change? It’s worth really thinking about how I would advise someone else if they had the exact problems I had. 

Alter Your Perspective
“Man does not simply exist but always decides what his existence will be, what he will become the next moment. By the same token, every human being has the freedom to change at any instant.” - Viktor Frankl / Only thing we control is ourselves and our attitude to problems and states. 

“.. Business opportunities are like buses; there’s always another coming around.” - Richard Branson / Wait for the fat pitches.. it’s slugging %, not batting average. Also, even if you swing and it doesn’t work… remember to iterate for the next pitch… that’s what it means to continuously pivot. In the grand scheme of life… 2 years of failed projects is nothing. 

Be the solution to a problem. If it’s a job interview or audition… don’t desire to get picked. Rather, be the solution to the problem. Empathize. Right actions follow the right perspective. This isn’t always easy. But always bring forward what you think is a problem for the people and be the solution for that problem. 

Is It Up To You?
“In life our first job is this, to divide and distinguish things into two categories: externals I cannot control, but the choices I make with regard to them I do control. Where will I find good and bad? In me, in my choices.” - Epectetus / What is within my circle of influence?  No point lamenting things that have happened.

“And what is up to us?

  • Our emotions

  • Our judgments

  • Our creativity

  • Our attitude

  • Our perspective

  • Our desires

  • Our decisions

  • Our determination"

“… the most harmful dragon we chase is the one that makes us think we can change things that are simply not ours to change.” / I struggle with this because I actually ’think’ I can change many things.. but overtime.. it’s become more so apparent that I cannot convince people of anything… people aren’t creatures to be convinced… but rather.. they will choose to change their mind through your actions. That’s probably the best way to create change. I’ve spend so long trying to change people’s perspectives and belinving that people had the intellectual honesty to make changes immediately but alas… that is not the case. Hence, the change that I can make is only in what I do… and to continue to do the work.

Live In The Present Moment
Companies started in depressions/economic crises: FedEX, UPS, Disney, HP, Charles Schwab, Standard Oil, Coors, Costco, Revlon, GM, P&G, Microsoft, Linkedin…. / opportunity. It’s probably worth looking at founders who start companies during such tough times as those with grit and the ‘cockroach mentality’ of survival. 

“It doesn’t matter whether this is the worst time to be alive or the best, whether you’re in a good job market or a bad one, or that the obstacle you face is intimidating or burdensome. What matters is that right now is right now.” / Take things one step at a time. Survive each day. Dogs are the greatest reminder of how pleasant the present is. But alas… my daily walks signify this for me as well. 

Think Differently
“An entrepreneur is someone with faith in their ability to make something where there was nothing before. To them, the idea that no one has ever done this or that is a good thing.” / this brings into question the common criticisms to be ‘realistic’ and ‘gather feedback’… there probably is a balance of when you want to apply being realistic and when feedback is useful.. like considering who you are receiving feedback from… because everyone sees the world from a different perspective.. one that’s been morphed by their own sets of experiences. Sometimes, the advice/feedback is useful but not because the person giving it is smart…. But because you reach that point yourself where that advice finally makes sense given a set of experiences you’ve had. But I wager… most people who’ve told me to be ‘realistic’ don’t live a life I’d like for myself. 

Finding The Opportunity
“There is good in everything, if only we look for it.” - Laura Ingalls Wilder / look for the opportunity within the obstacle. 

“The struggle against an obstacle vitally propels the fighter to a new level of functioning. The extent of the struggle determines the extent of the growth. The obstacle is an advantage, not adversity. The enemy is any perception that prevents us from seeing this.”

Discipline of Action
“People turn shit into sugar all the time - shit that’s a lot worse than whatever we’re dealing with. I’m talking physical disabilities, racial discrimination, battles against overwhelmingly superior armies. But those people didn’t quit. They didn’t feel sorry for themselves. They didn’t delude themselves with fantasies about easy solutions. They focused on the one thing that mattered: applying themselves with gusto and creativity.” / STFU and do something about it. Though, there will be down times.. when defeat sucks.. then I’m reminded of Pressfield’s ‘resistance’… and it’s the same message here. Fight the resistance. 

Get Moving
“Tell yourself: The time for that has passed. The wind is rising. The bell’s been rung. Get started, get moving. We often assume that the world moves at our leisure. We delay when we should initiate. We jog when we should be running or, better yet, sprinting. And then we’re shocked - shocked! - when nothing big ever happens, when opportunities never show up, when new obstacles begin to pile up, or the enemies finally get their act together. Of course they did, we gave them room to breathe. We gave them the chance. / Guilty. Though it may be upsetting because you feel like no one around you is working harder than you but opportunity doesn’t seem to be coming… the fact is that no one can predict opportunity.. and even the ‘breathing room’ to think such thoughts means that you need to pumping out more. Though working 100 hours a week did burn me out… it’s not about the quantity of hours but the quality. An intensity. Build the intensity. 

Always be moving…. Going for a walk to meditate is still an action… a form of active rest to actively recharge. It’s a purposeful act of stillness. 

Practice Persistence
“In persistence, he’d not only broken through: In trying it all the wrong ways, Grant discovered a totally new way - the way that would eventually win the war. Grant’s story is not the exception to the rule. It is the rule. This is how innovation works.” / persistently bang away at solving the problem. Attempt every means possible whether it be conventional or not.. until you are forced to think differently and that eventually solves the problem. It’s like calculus. Not statistics. Stats tells you to give up because there is only 3% chance of success but stats is always backwards looking. 

“… proving that genius often really is just persistence in disguise.” / A common saying is that 10K hours is not as valuable because if you do the same thing over again then it doesn’t work… but that implicitly assumes people to be stupid. What kind of an idiot will do the same thing 10K times expecting the same result? No.. most people are creative and with enough trial and error they will continuously tweak little by little. The outside cannot know because they are spectators. But that’s persistence. Don’t overthink it and ignore what others say. You just stay persistent. As long as YOU know you are making iterations that’s all that matters. 

“Too many people think that great victories like Grant’s and Edison’s came from a flash of insight. That they cracked the problem with pure genius. In fact, it was the slow pressure, repeated from many different angles, the elimination of so many other promising options, that slowly and surely churned the solution to the top of the pile. Their genius was unity of purpose, deafness to doubt, and the desire to stay at it. So what if this method isn’t as “scientific” or “proper” as others? The important part is that it works. Working at it works.” / It’s simple really… people say your passion is something you’d do without pay… well.. I know of no friends who would spend 2 years doing what I did with no salary… so implicit in this journey is for me to realize that this is something I genuinely enjoy doing. Because.. why else would I be doing this? Why else would I constantly be trying to make OMDV a success? The important thing is to stick to it. To stay on it and to not quit. 

“..Epictetus: “persist and resist.” Persist in your efforts. Resist giving in to distraction, discouragement, or disorder.” 

“Only in struggling with the impediments that made others quit can we find ourselves on untrodden territory.” / as Emerson says… you are to live your life. Not the life others understand or expect of you. Not the life deemed appropriate by society. A life that ends with you striving to do your work. Whatever that evolves to. 

“It’s supposed to be hard. Your first attempts aren’t going to work…” / As long as I feel I’m getting closer every day. Hard to know what that finished product is. But I’m working at “it”. 

Iterate
“Great entrepreneurs are:

  • Never wedded to a position / no sunk cost. No emotional attachment. It’s not the only and last option

  • Never afraid to lose a little of their investment / risk management here. As long as it’s reversible. What price are you willing to pay? 

  • Never bitter or embarrassed / oh boy. 

  • Never out of the game for long" / always moving forward. 

“Failure shows us the way - by showing us what isn’t the way.” 

Follow the Process
Finish everything you do. Follow through and finish before moving on. Simple but hard. 

Do Your Job, Do It Right
Simple. Don’t complain. Do what others won’t and do a kickers job at it. Everything you are doing matters. There is no wasted time. It’s your attitude towards that time that thinks it’s wasteful. Whatever you do, decide to do, do it well. Be proud of what you put time into. 

“… Viktor Frankl, survivor of three concentration camps, found presumptuousness in the age-old question: “What is the meaning of life?” As though it is someone else’s responsibility to tell you. Instead, he said, the world is asking you that question. And it’s your job to answer with your actions.” / actions speak louder than words. Show what you mean by doing it. Words are cheap compared to actions. Aka… putting your money where your mouth is the way to combat that with investing. 

What’s Right is What Works
“Forget the rule book, settle the issue.”

Focus on results. Once you know the why, the how will come. It doesn’t matter if the how is not how everyone else would do it. Do the best with what you have because you’ll never get perfect alignment at any time. 

Progress > perfection.

In Praise of the Flank Attack
Go where others are not. Your disadvantages can be your disadvantages. Focus your limited resources elsewhere if a frontal assault won’t work. 

Seek to appear effortless in what you do.. because that’s the point when you go down the road less traveled. There is no traffic there. This doesn’t mean it’s a shortcut. It can appear to be a long way around. But the long way around might be the shortest route to what you are trying to achieve.

Use Obstacles Against Themselves
“We wrongly assume that moving forward is the only way to progress, the only way we can win. Sometimes, staying put, going sideways, or moving backward is actually the best way to eliminate what blocks or impedes your path.” / a retreat is required to win wars. Sometimes you just have to let the obstacle be. Be humble. Your method may not be able to overcome the obstacle. Take a different path. Just like how I couldn’t convince folks in tech or HR that someone with an investing background is required for people development… realize their own egos and fears are too big an obstacle. Take the other way. Pursue the path of investing and media to achieve what I want. Don’t stand to convince those who do not wish to be convinced. They are safe in their nests and do not wish to change. That’s your opportunity. 

Seize the Offensive
“What you must do is learn how to press forward precisely when everyone around you sees disaster.”

Prepare for None of it to Work
“We must be willing to roll the dice and lose. Prepare, at the end of the day, for none of it to work.” / easier said than done. Sure… you want to be someone who can accept the verdict of defeat and move on but… its not easy. And maybe that’s fine. It’s another skill that requires practice. I think failing so many times does indeed help tamper expectations. I used to think everything I did would work because they eventually did. But this journey has been more difficult than any career jump I may have done. Also because I think it takes a lot of work to understand yourself… 

The Discipline of the Will
“If Perception and Action were the disciplines of the mind and the body, then Will is the discipline of the hear and the soul. The will is the one thing we control completely, always.” / part of that is the will to be adaptable and flexible in the constantly changing world. The will to withstand the shitstorm that the world will through onto me during the course of my life. Seek to become anti fragile. 

Build Your Inner Citadel
“Mens sana in corpore sano - sound mind in a strong body” / isn’t this a driving purpose on the meaning of life? Shouldn’t everyone strive to achieve this as a baseline? I’d actually think this to be the purpose of an individual’s life. 

“The path of least resistance is a terrible teacher.” 

Anticipation (Thinking Negatively)
Shits going to fail so prepare for it. The stoic method of fear setting. List out al the worst case scenarios so you are prepped. The worst case scenario would be that I quit too early and be some unfulfilled cubicle worker in financial reporting. Not too bad when compared to others but a life I’d rather not live. But alas, so many things can go wrong. I mean… I could be at this for another 2 years and nothing could work out. And no-one would want to give me a job because I’m deemed qualified for nothing. I’m out of touch with the world and my bank account has widdled. I’d imagine though I would’ve continued to learn things.. about more companies and people… which should account for something but in the worst case… once again.. no one cares and it’s not transferrable. Rough. 

Beware the calm before the form. Hope for the best, prepare for the worst. The worst is yet to come. It gets worse before it gets better.” / Wonder when you know the difference of shit just sucking and eventually working vs. Shit sucking and it going to continue to suck cause I’m working on the wrong thing… I mean.. do we ever know? Because no one can predict the future….

Love Everything That Happens: Amor Fati
Love fate. Shit happens and you can do only thing. Change your attitude towards it. Don’t resend or be bitter. Easier said than done.. I think I’ve already come off a little bitter in some parts of this book review… however! Work hard to love everything. 

Take on the attitude that everything that has happened was meant to happen. Because it happened. What else are you going to do about it? What does complaining achieve to which that has already happened? Feel great about everything Don’t just accept it and say you’re fine. Say it’s great and amazing that it happened. Make the best of every situation. 

See every bad situation as an opportunity for greater joy in life. 

Perseverance
“Persistence. Everything directed at one problem, until it breaks.” / perseverance is probably the same as grit. Gritty. The endurance to fight through. If anything… I have this… even at the expense of stupidity lol. Keep it simple. I’ll probably jut bash my head through everything until I get it. 

Willpower compounds. 

“There are far more failures in the world due to a collapse of will than there will ever be from objectively conclusive external events.”

“… momentum and defeat are not mutually exclusive…” / one way may be blocked but that doesn’t mean you have to stop moving. Move somewhere else. Losting a battle is fine. A single battle could result in losing a war. To prevent it, bugger onwards. 

“Nothing other than death can prevent us from following Churchill’s old acronym: KBO. Keep Buggering On.” / You never know when death will come for you. So STFU and keep moving on doing what your life requires of you. I also had a thought pop into my mind…. That the obstacle I face with not having a salary… means I have more time and energy than any employed sap to further progress faster in building out my platform. So… not time to waste. 

Something Bigger Than Yourself
Hmm… I wanted to help entrepreneurs.. but what if I can also help investors who wish to do the same thing as me by sharing more of my studies and works? Maybe that’s something that could be of value to them… or sharing with entrepreneurs what investors who invest in people look for.. 

Constantly thinking about how I can help others as a way to tackle the problem differently when I’m stuck… if what I’m doing would be valuable to someone else.. 

Meditate on Your Mortality 
“It doesn’t matter who you are or how many things you have left to be done, somewhere there is someone who would kill you for a thousand dollars or for a vial of crack or for getting in their way. A car can hit you in an intersection and drive your teeth back into your skull. That’s it. It will all be over. Today, tomorrow, someday soon.” / life is truly fragile. 

Death helps us prioritize what is truly important. Hence, memento mori. Do life right. For you will one day die. When.. you will not know. A death calendar probably is a good visual to create to help prioritize life. 

Prepare to Start Again
“Behind mountains are more mountains.” / if you overcome obstacles… there will be more obstacles for the next part of your journey. There is no paradise after your obstacles. The bigger obstacles you overcome the bigger the next set. 


Disclaimer - I’m writing this for myself. For my past, present and future self. Much of what I write is my opinion. If it somehow ignites agreement in you then great, I’d love to hear about it. If it sparks disagreement in you, don’t reach out because I don’t care for it. There always are obvious exceptions and the flawed person in me hasn’t considered them all.